Swallowing the waves 

Although I’m still drifting to sleep feeling it would be easier to give up and never do it again…my day was as follows! 
Winding my way to my first surf lesson, my tummy is in knots but I’m super excited too. 

It’s 7am, I’ve been awake since 6 and tossed and turned all night with my whole body aching and freaking out about this morn! Yesterday I Sup’d for two hours then canoed, snorkelled and then went to yoga in the pouring rain, was ment to be relaxing but she was in boot camp mode!! Such an awesome day. I paddled further than I ever had along and it felt amazing! It was beautiful, vast and just so calming. 

So… My lesson! Hardcore! No beating around the bush! No nice intro! 9ft board and out to the area where the actual surfers go…not the surf schools!!
Paddle paddle paddle… Standddddd uppppppppp

Fuck fuck fuck, swallow water, try and breath under water, where the fuck is the sky, Jesus I’m up, I’m alive. I seriously thought I was Guna drown, under the water inhaling water then would rise and get smashed again! Holy shit another wave and I’m under again! Repeat this maybe 6 times, each time trying to stand and then smash! The last time I was screaming “come on come on your mine” half up then smash, I didn’t know when I was going to get up! 17 seconds later apparently…I popped up like a flapper fish got on the board and looked across at my buddy (maybe not so much anymore) and did the sign of slitting my throat. 

Paddled out south to the area where they teach and asked to sit with them. 

Was awesome, everything I imagined, out in the big blue all sitting on our boards having the perfect work day “board meeting”. I lined up for a wave but by this time I was feeling super weak but went for it and the board being a little heavy now I allowed it to flip up and got smashed around my head twice… I was done, I felt liberated that I had gone through my worst fears as I knew u had to go through it. Now I know what to expect.


So I leave the beach (beat, looking like shit as above but bloody proud)  and end up going for brunch with a guy I met out there, he’s traveling so was cool to talk and plan some adventures and more surf as island novices. 


I can’t explain my fatigue, I was shattered, my eyes wouldn’t stay open. It was like I was high, in a blur, like in a bubble where I just wanted to curl up and sleep for days.
But oh nooooooooooo. Off for round two after stuffing my face with fish, bananas and peanut butter (www.mani-life.com) washed down with a super strong Kona coffee! We are in the car on the way to another beach, I crash out, I’ve never passed out in a car but yes I did! 
Get to most stunning beach and I go slow, beginner waves AND I stand! Not well but I stood!

 

I feel awesome. Polar opposite experiences but if truth be told, i’ve essentially ticked off the things that scare me the most. Packing up my life, leaving my niece, my family,being away from my best friend, living off no money, being somewhere I know no one and pretty much being as far I could be from everything I’m used to. Along with the ocean and getting wiped out and feeling like I would die, or dying! But……. I’ve done it!!!!! I’m alive. 

I’m in bed finally, I can feel the leash on my ankle and the waves in my breath. My ribs are fucked, my knees are bruised and swollen, my toes have sea urchin spikes in them, I’m a little sun stroked and knackered,
But 

I went back out and I could stand so it was ok and I was amongst the most insane power you could experience. Forget chasing money, your next car or next material piece, chase a challenge, push your self and everyday touch the ground! Touch the earth and feel it!!! 

In the words of my mumma “one life live it” and in two weeks I feel I am!!!! 

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